February 26 2010

We start with Lucky breaking into Johnny's garage. "Freeze! Police!", he calls. And who's the perpetrator? Why, it's Luke.

Johnny and Ethan are still playing cards at the Haunted Star. Johnny seems to be losing on purpose and Ethan knows it.

Spinelli comes into Jason's apartment wearing a chefs outfit? Jason tells him that they need to breakout Sonny.

Claire and Diane continue to argue their cases, the flight risks as well as the relevance of Dante's testimony. Alexis keeps objecting and the Judge keeps shooting her down. I'm surprised she isn't in jail yet.

Steven and Lisa watch Robin and Patrick fight about Sonny. He's worried about their daughter who is growing up in a mob town. Steven tries to calm them down, but also tells Patrick to go over the rules about releasing a patient. Robin is still pissed that because they released Dante, he has to testify against his own father. Lisa finally cuts in and wants to know why Robin is always defending mobsters citing Jason waving a gun at a patient as her first example and Sonny shooting Dante as her second. Robin says that they're her friends. Really Robin? The same friends who completely shunned you when you told the truth about Michael's patronage? Lisa says it's pretty much black and white. A person who shoots an unarmed man point blank in the chest is not a good person.

Ethan thinks Johnny wants him to help because he's Luke's son. Johnny says it's not. Ethan plays hard to get. Johnny cuts to the chase. He has to go; he tells him where it will all go down and drops a wad of cash on the card table as incentive. Tracy comes in and says whatever he's selling, they don't want any.

What's Lucky doing there? Looking for hijacked goods. Luke? Pretty much the same thing in the form of cigars. Luke says the shipment Lucky is looking for is there. Which....I'm sure detective Lucky could have figured out by the 30 warehouse boxes lying around.

Jason, Sam and Spinelli plan the escape.

Alexis talks again. The judge tells her to join in as co-council or get out. She has five seconds. In those five seconds, Alexis joins Diane's firm and is now co-council. Claire wants to question Dante. Judge says she can call Dante to the stand.

Jason, Sam and Spinelli plan the escape. Part two. Sam is the decoy. Spinelli is on computers. Jason is singing lead vocals.

Alexis and Diane talk on either side of Sonny. He wants them to protect Dante. Claire questions Dante. He says his name and undercover name. Diane wants the court to know that he has since resigned from the NYPD. Claire asks Dante about Sonny's access to funds which Dante says he has lots of. Claire asks about the shooting. Diane and Alexis immediately object.

Tracy tells Johnny that they're closed. Tracy lists the reasons why Johnny is bad news. It's not like they're going to date, Tracy. Although, I wouldn't hate that. Johnny says he's a bad influence and leaves. Ethan knows he's getting played but he thinks Johnny has a good point.

Lucky tells Luke about Johnny's involvement in the shooting at pier 52. Luke tells Lucky about Johnny at the Haunted Star and Ethan's potential involvement. They're both worried about Ethan. Lucky tells Luke about his car crash and what led up to it.

Robin says Sonny has been a good friend to her. Lisa admits he's charming. Patrick says this all happened when she was a teenager. Robin brings up Stone...again. Steven joins in on the bash Sonny and Robin day....which I'm all for. Robin is offended and leaves.

Luke wants to know what happened at Shadybrook. He says he lied that he forgave Elizabeth and mentions Helena as well. Luke says it's too early for forgiveness. Lucky says he just wants to get passed the anger. He wants some advice. Luke talks about them going away again and jokes that they'll kidnap Ethan too. He tells Lucky that maybe it's time to realize that things are over between him and Elizabeth.

Tracy tries to warn Ethan about Johnny. She has no sons left in Port Charles to play mama with so I guess Ethan will do. They argue about Johnny some more. Tracy begs him to think about who Johnny really is and even tries to use "think about what your dad will go through" as an excuse. Ethan "never set out to be the stable reliable son. Why start now?"

Robin is on the phone with the lab, getting pissed. Steven takes over and calmly talks to the lab tech saying Robin will be leaving for the evening. Robin is pissed that Steven has undermined her to her colleagues and now to the lab. He calmly explains that angering the lab won't help anyone and says they need to go.

Jason, Sam and Spinelli plan the escape, part three. They have to sell everything to make this happen. Spinelli is worried that Jason will get caught and arrested. Or worse: Stuck in Canada.

I hate recapping court cases. Diane and Alexis argue that Dante's shooting has nothing to do with the case at hand. Claire says it does....it goes back and forth for a bit until - the judge wants to hear it. Claire says that Dante was heavily drugged when he first made his statement but Dante says he knew what he was saying. She asks him if he has anything to add to his statement. I see her tactic here. She's giving him an out for perjury since he was so heavily sedated so that he might tell the truth now. Very smart. Except it won't work. She asks him one last time, "Who shot you?"

When we come back, Alexis objects AGAIN that Dante already made his statement. Claire is only asking for clarification. Alexis wants to know why Claire is trying to get Dante to change his response. Claire wants to know why Alexis is so afraid of what Dante might say. Check and ....not quite mate. Judge....can I just hear the answer?? Me too. Dante asks for the question to be repeated. Really? He then tells his fake story about how he shot himself. Lulu and Jax's faces are disappointed.

Jason thinks he might have to disappear. Sam and Spinelli object but Jason says they just need to get this done.

At Kelly's, Steven buys Robin a chocolate milkshake. He tells Robin that Liz and the kids are doing fine. Steven tries to get down to the heart of the matter of why Robin defends all these mob guys. Guza speaks through Robin saying that Sonny and Jason do awful things but they also do wonderful things. There's some awful distracting music in the back round. Steven gets it a little more after Robin explains it but he wonders how it makes Patrick feel.

Patrick is playing darts at Jake's when Lisa comes by. Patrick is in a bad mood and Lisa tries to make him feel better. She thinks everyone needs to get along! For the patient's sake! Wait...Lisa and Patrick and Steven and Robin aren't in the hospital! Who will take care of all the patients?! GH doesn't have any other doctors, damn it! I can just picture Epiphany going from OR to OR..."hello....?" I bet she'll be sassy about it. Patrick buys the first round. Lisa wants to know, "what is with Robin and these mob guys?" He explains. Seems Patrick is more pissed that he's not a let in to that part of her life. Some people get to be the surgeons. Some people get to be the mobsters. You made your choice, Patrick. You made your choice.

Patrick hates that Robin never talks about Stone. He feels shut out.

Steven thinks Patrick has a point that he doesn't understand her defense of Jason and Sonny. Robin says that's because he wasn't there when it all went down. There's a lot of psycho-analyzing going on and Robin's "huh...I never thought of it that way" sitcom face shines through.

Lucky hears about Sonny's arraignment/bail hearing and tells Luke. They both deduce that Jason will try to break Sonny out. Luke tells Lucky that he needs to get his shit together for his family because this shit just got real.

Claire continues questioning Dante. She wants to know how Dante can be such a dumbass, shooting his own damn self. Alexis: Objection, badgering her own witness. Diane wants all of Dante's testimony thrown out. Judge: Nice try. Hee. Dante can finally step down. Claire again asks for bail to be revoked. Judge asks for a recess.

Robin can't believe she's married! And with a child! She describes her past love lives and how she met Patrick. Steven wants to know why Patrick isn't being let in. She says she's not trying to exclude him.

Shooting! Ethan, as predicted joins Johnny. They're being shot at!

Luke is worried and really wants to go away with Lucky but Lucky says he has things to do.

Jason, Sam, Max and Milo are getting ready. The plan is Milo will pretend to attack Sam as a diversion. Spinelli is on the phone with Jason using all sorts of code. Jason, "Spinelli, if you're going to use code, the other guy needs to know what it means." Hee! I bet this will go off without a hitch.

Jax tells Claire that he is not impressed. She's hoping the judge will read between the lines. Diane tells Alexis not to get too close to Sonny when he leaves the courthouse because she knows what's coming. Sonny goes over to Dante to say goodbye. He thanks Dante for his false testimony. Dante insists he didn't do it for him. And here's the judge's decision: We'll find out Monday. It's like waiting for American Idol results and the Judge is Ryan Seacrest.

So Monday will be my first day of unemployment so I'll probably be doing this earlier. YAY!

-end

February 25 2010

So I've only lost about two minutes with a weather storm watch. It's snowing! Yeah, we got it.

I decided to just watch on Soapnet. Here we go!

Michael doesn't get why Sonny has to confess to a murder he committed. Jason tries to explain that he's just protecting Michael but then finally admits the real truth: "It's what Sonny wants." Which is just the answer for life, the universe and everything. Michael wants to know if Jason would let Sonny take the rap for someone [Jason] murdered.

Lulu is checking the outcome of Sonny's arraignment on her cellphone in Dante's hospital room, but there's no news yet. Mac stops by. He's there with Dante's subpoena. And damn it, I always have to look up how to spell that word!

Johnny surprises Olivia with a kiss at the metro-court. He wants to have dinner with her but she reminds him that she wants nothing to do with the mob. Neither of them are going to change their minds but the loves and respects her. She says she can't walk down that road again.

Court: Claire tries to convince the judge that Sonny is a flight risk. Alexis objects. Judge Meany reminds Alexis that she's not part of the proceedings. Claire makes a final argument that if Sonny leaves the courtroom today, they won't see him again.

The subpoena given to Dante is for the arraignment turned bail hearing. Mac and Lulu both think it's possible that Sonny is a flight risk. Mac says if they can't get a doctor's signature to release Dante, they'll take his testimony there - but they'd rather have him in person to have maximum impact. Mac leaves.

Patrick congratulates Robin with her work on a patient. Lisa and Steven come by psyched about the Tim McGraw concert....and this isn't the south. But anyway, Patrick acts jealous and Robin says he's just mad that he's not going which...isn't that the definition of jealousy? Robin says they're going to the philharmonic and Steven acts inappropriate in the work place by saying his employee is whipped already after a year of marriage. Mac comes by and tells Robin that he just served a subpoena to Dante. Robin thinks it's a lot of pressure to make a guy testify against his own father.

Ethan and Kristina are still playing poker when Sam joins. She thinks Alexis wouldn't approve. Kristina agrees which is why she didn't tell her. Kristina gets a text and excuses herself to make a call but not before telling Ethan that her hand was terrible anyway. Ethan tells her not to give away that information. Kristina thinks he's amazing and Sam tells her to go make her call.

Outside Kelly's, Kristina tells Keifer's voicemail that she won't be able to make their plans. Back inside, Sam gets all 'big sister' and has a talk with Ethan. Ethan knows Kristina has a crush. Sam wants to know why he's encouraging her.

Jason explains the rules of the mob to Michael. And ok, next!

Johnny gets behind the bar and pours himself a drink. Heh. Olivia futilely tries to convince Johnny that the mob life isn't for him using Sonny as an example. The only thing Johnny takes out of it is the comparison to Sonny. He still wants Olivia to be his moll and won't take no for an answer.

Jax leaves a message for Claire wishing her luck. Dawson comes by and wants to know why Claire took over to the Corinthos case. Jax says she's the best and failure is not an option. He wants Sonny in jail.

Claire continues her argument but Diane says that Sonny could have left town at any time and hasn't. Claire argues that Sonny hasn't left yet because he had to stick by his son who got shot. Sonny interrupts because he wants a word with Diane. He wants a recess. She doesn't think it's prudent but Sonny insists and even manhandles her and condescends to her. Douche. The judge wants to know what's up so Diane asks for that recess. Alexis thinks Sonny has just shown everyone in the court what a total douche he really is.

Dante just wants to "be nice to a messed-up kid with daddy issues and a jerk boyfriend." Hee. And aww. Sam agrees that Kiefer is bad news but she thinks that Ethan might be unintentionally leading her on. Ethan agrees to dial it back. Kristina comes back and Sam excuses herself and goes to the counter. Ethan tells Kristina that he has to get to work. She's disappointed so he tells her he didn't mean to lead her on. He says she's too young for him. Kristina's pissed at Sam.

Sonny calls up Jason and summons him to the courthouse. Michael wants to know if something's wrong but of course Jason doesn't know anything except that his Sonny needs him. Before he leaves, he tells Max to keep an eye on Michael to keep him from going to the court room to confess.

Alexis introduces herself to Claire. She wonders what happened to Everett Dawson. When Jax shows up, she pretty much figures it out. She goes over to Jax and asks him what he's done.

Diane is pissed at Sonny. She warns him to not ever talk to her like that again. Sonny says the recess was the only thing between him and a prison cell and he's "not going."

Dante knew he would have to testify, just not this soon. Steven stops by. He wants to wait to sign the clearance forms until after Dante has had another round of tests. Lulu leaves to get Dante a suit. Robin stops by. She wants to talk to him about Sonny.

Johnny catches Lulu at the elevator as she's leaving. She asks him to not visit Dante right now because he doesn't need the stress. He wonders if Dante will actually testify against his dad.

Diane doesn't want Sonny to continue to be a douche in the courtroom and then Jason arrives. She wants to know what he's doing there and Sonny says he called him. I guess he will continue to be a douche, Diane. Sorry! She thinks this is all a bad idea. She tells Jason about Claire Walsh and warns him to get out of the courtroom before he's handled a subpoena. She leaves them to talk. Sonny tells Jason that he needs to get out of the country. .,....which is what Jason and Carly and others have been telling him for weeks. Douche.

Jax is insulted by Alexis' insinuation that he's "done" something. But then he admits that he is responsible for Claire Walsh. Alexis thinks that Sonny being in prison is not the best thing for his kids. She wants him to back off.

Kristina knows Sam was the one who ran Ethan off. She says Sam was the one who thought she should stay away from Keifer. Sam agrees but says that doesn't mean she should jump from one person to another. She thinks that Ethan is way too old for her but Kristina reminds Sam about her affair with Sonny, where the age difference was way bigger. Hee. Sam says she was an adult when she entered that relationship and she doesn't want to discuss it any further. Kristina walks away mad.

Lulu doesn't know if Dante will testify. Johnny remembers how Lulu was so fond of Sonny. Lulu said she was wrong and she hates Sonny. I'm so with ya, babe. I remember that I started watching this show because of Sonny and now he's the character I hate the most. She says that Sonny could still get away with this: "They could have a video of Sonny killing Claudia and he'd still slip through the cracks." Spot on. Johnny doesn't think so. Because Johnny doesn't watch the show.

Robin shows Dante a picture of her and Stone. She tells the story of Stone and Sonny. The whole story is just to show how great Sonny is. And he was - I remember all this. But that's the whole thing. He was. That was about ten years ago. He's had quite a history since. Patrick is listening in. He barges in and says he needs to talk to Robin.

Sonny is worried he'll be going to prison and needs a contingency plan.

Jax is outraged that Alexis is protecting Sonny. She's worried about Kristina and for the second time this episode, the phrase "daddy issues" is uttered. She tries to convince Jax to help her. "You've got to be kidding me," Jax and I utter at the same time. He says Kristina and the other kids will get over it because they have good parents who will raise them right which won't happen if Sonny sticks around. Alexis goes over and warns Claire that she's "walking into a hornet's nest" and that Jax only asked for her help because he's emotionally involved. Claire thinks that's great and will use it to her advantage.

Johnny comes by the Haunted Star and wants a private game. Ethan grabs a bottle and they go play. Johnny tells Ethan that there are better ways to earn money. Ethan wonders if Johnny has a death wish going after Sonny and he also wants to know why Johnny thinks that he would want to join his crusade.

Max tries to distract Michael with sports stuff. Michael knows what he's doing. Kristina stops by. Max leaves the two of them to talk. Michael tells her that she should be at court. She hopes he's not still thinking about confessing. He thinks he needs to but Kristina thinks that covering for Michael is the one decent thing that Sonny has done.

Robin tells Patrick that she was just trying to give Dante a balanced view about Sonny but Patrick thinks that she was just trying to protect Sonny. Robin admits it's true because she doesn't know what good will come from Sonny being put in jail. Oh, Robin. Patrick says it's none of her business.

Lulu comes by with the suit. Dante asks Lulu about Stone. Lulu knows who he is but was too young to remember him well. Dante tells Lulu about what Robin told her. He talks about Sonny in a new light and it kills me and Lulu has a look but she's trying to be a good girlfriend but it doesn't matter because Dante sees it. She says she'll support him with whatever he decides but she doesn't look too happy about it.

Jason runs home and calls for Spinelli but he's not there. Sam, who is talking to Spinelli on her cell gives Jason the phone. He tells Spinelli that he needs him home right away and hangs up with no concern for Sam who was on the phone with Spinelli for a reason. Sam goes to argue but then remembers her sole purpose in life is to please Jason and asks him what's up. He tells Sam about the arraignment. She guesses that he'll break Sonny out.

Court is back in session and Diane continues her argument. She argues that Sonny's ties including the three out of four children he's close to are here. Alexis tries to whisper something to Diane but Judge Meany overhears and reprimands her.

Ethan agrees that Sonny is bad and empathizes with Johnny but thinks Sonny is too dangerous to mess with. Johnny explains his plan to Ethan because not enough people know that he wants Sonny to pay. He says that prison isn't good enough and he wants to dismantle Sonny piece by piece.

Lulu helps Dante into his suit and it hurts because he was shot in the chest just a few weeks earlier. Patrick comes in and signs the clearance forms behind Steven's back and encourages Dante to go. Dante wants to know why Patrick is so keen on him testifying since he thought that he was friends with Sonny and knows Robin is such good friends with Sonny. Patrick says it's not his place to judge.

Steven and Robin look at Dante's test results and Steven says they look good. Robin was hoping that Dante would have more time. They see Dante leaving (without a wheelchair?) and tells them Patrick signed his release. Steven tells Patrick that he had no right to release his patient. Robin says it's because he didn't want her talking to Dante again and Patrick agrees. I honestly can't remember what changed Patrick's mind about Sonny.

Jason needs Sam's help. Sam: "I will do whatever you need, whenever you need it - just let me know." Which epitomizes Sam's character completely. Jason explains the deal. He says the best time to get Sonny free is between the court house and lock-up.

Ethan doesn't like revenge and pretty much dares Johnny to convince him. Johnny does. He says now is the time to take over warehouse 51.

Steven chastises Patrick for overstepping. After he leaves, Robin and Patrick argue about Sonny while Lisa listens. He doesn't understand how she can still think he's a saint after he shot an unarmed man. Ah, so I guess that's it.

Longest. Arraignment/Bail hearing. Ever. Diane continues to argue for bail. Claire goes next. She says Sonny's altruism and philanthropy don't outweigh the murder and other crimes. She calls Dante to the stand. DUN!

-end

February 24 2010

I decided to change the layout in honor of the new credits! Big Arraigment! Let's get started! I like exclamation points!

Jason comes home to a sleeping Sam. She slowly wakes up and asks him where he's been all night.

Jax meets someone named "Claire" at the metro-court. He's hired her for something but we don't know what yet.

Johnny comes out of Kelly's with a cup that has no coffee in it. He runs into Michael and wants to know why he's not at the courthouse. Michael, "What if I told you that my father didn't kill Claudia". He knows, Michael.

Sonny is dressed for a funeral. Since this is his first day of court, I'm assuming it's his funeral. He spies a newspaper with his face right on the front page as Diane comes in. She doesn't want him to talk in court. She sees his outfit and hates it but she says it in the most awesome way possible: "Sonny, go upstairs right now and take your clothes off."

New Credits! Epiphany! Matt!

Epiphany sasses at Robin who throws down a file on the nurses station counter. Epiphany doesn't file! She has more important things to do! Lisa comes by and throws down her file and Epiphany is doubley pissed. She wants to leave early because she wants to get Beyonce tickets. Excuse me while I do my 'Single Ladies' dance. And, I'm back. Epiphany gets Steven in on the mix to set his doctors straight! Lisa can hook Epiphany up with Beyonce tickets!

Jason tells Sam that he had to rearrange the whole transport system because Dante and Johnny know too much. Sam thinks Johnny is looking for power but Jason tells her that he's just looking to avenge his sister. He says even though Johnny knows that Michael killed Claudia, he still thinks Sonny is to blame. Sam thinks she can help.

Johnny warns Michael to stay silent and that they're not on the same side. They argue about who is more to blame, Sonny or Claudia. Johnny tells Michael that Claudia deserves Justice.

Olivia is at the Metro-Court bar watching Jax while on her cell. Over at the Jax table, Claire is feisty! She's like a paler Brenda. She's trying to get at what exactly Jax wants her to do but is interrupted by Olivia. Olivia assumes they're on a date and talks herself stupid about Carly. Claire: "Jax, you never told me you were married." But all sarcastic like and it's pretty awesome and I like this girl.

Also women I love? Diane, who chides Sonny for his outfit. Sonny, of course, argues because he knows everything. She tells Sonny that the judge hates organized crime. He wants her to get another judge. Diane snaps her fingers and makes it so. That doesn't actually happen but it seems that Sonny thinks that it's something that actually can happen. Diane is still pissed about Sonny's proposed plea.

Epiphany doesn't believe that Lisa can get her the tickets. She threatens to assign her to OR3 if she can't and walks off. Lisa wants to know what's wrong with OR3. Robin, who is joined by Patrick says it's cursed. Steven didn't know that either. After the others leave, Patrick bets Robin that Lisa will come up with the tickets.

Alexis thinks Kristina works too hard. Kristina thinks the same about her mom. She notices that Alexis is in her "court clothes" and wonders who she's defending. Saved by the knock on the door! Kiefer stops by and Kristina hides. Alexis lies to Kiefer and says she's not available. After he leaves, she asks Kristina what's going on. Alexis, who doesn't know the whole story tells Kristina to tell Keifer the truth whether it's to break up with him or not.

Michael thinks Johnny is a hypocrite for not telling anyone about Dante. He thinks he should have warned someone besides Sonny since he doesn't hate anyone else. Johnny has no regrets about his decision because he knew Dante was only after Sonny. Mike walks past, hobbling on a cane and Michael goes to open the door for him. Mike wants a word with Johnny.
Johnny reluctantly follows Michael and Mike in. Mike gets Michael out of there by asking him to go do something in the kitchen. Mike wants Johnny to stop giving Michael a hard time. He thinks Johnny has it in for anyone connected to Sonny but Johnny says he has nothing against anyone but Sonny. He empathizes with Michael and says the only time he ever had any peace was when his dad was put in prison and hopes Michael gets the same kind of peace. It's a well written and acted monologue he does. Bravo.

Olivia doesn't get Claire's sarcasm because she continues to dig herself deeper talking about Jax's stepsons and new daughter. Claire actually is surprised and delighted by this and wants to see pictures. Olivia, "I can show you pictures of her with his wife." And...she still doesn't get it. Olivia is done keeping secrets - everyones - and she's tired of Carly's wrath. Jax insists he doing 'this' for his marriage. It's still unclear what 'this' is. She storms off. Claire wants to know how she did. Jax is happy.
Remember when Jax and Brenda were trying to make Lois and Sonny jealous respectively? Maybe Jax will end up with this girl.

Diane says at least the prosecutor is lazy and dumb and won't be dropping any surprises. Diane doesn't have any surprises either. Jason arrives and Diane leaves. Before she leaves, she tells Jason to stay as far away as possible and convince Sonny to change. Sonny has a task for Jason.

Oooooh. So it turns out Claire is the new prosecutor. She knows all of Diane's tactics and is confident of a conviction.

Alexis is at the court house waiting for Diane. She's helping Diane out with some things for the trial. Diane takes this to mean that Alexis will be joining her law firm. It doesn't, but Diane won't accept her help otherwise.

Kristina visits Mike in the kitchen at Kelly's. She offers to help Mike. Mike thinks she's worried about Dante and Sonny. Kristina thinks her dad deserves what he's getting. Mike compares the situation to his own situation with Sonny. Kristina thanks Mike and walks out to find Kiefer. He wants to know if she'll ever forgive him.

So Sam has summoned Johnny to chez Jason and I wonder why he'd bother stopping by. Sam thinks she's objective because she didn't know Claudia but Johnny knows she can't be since she's dating Jason. She wants him to back off so Jason won't kill him. She says that Claudia threw her life away and if Johnny doesn't back off, he'll be doing the same thing.

Sonny wants Jason to talk to Michael about his plea because if he sees that Jason is ok with it, he won't want to confess. Cue Michael's entrance. Jason excuses himself. Sonny tells him the arraignment won't be a big deal. They have a heartwarming father/son chat. Did I say heartwarming? I meant heartburning.

Patrick tells Steven about the bet. Epiphany doesn't want everyone talking about her! Lisa comes by and tells Epiphany to check her e-mail. Patrick won the bet! Epiphany is happy! And no longer sassy! She guarantees that Lisa will never see the inside of OR3. Robin pays up and Lisa jokes that she should never bet against her. Steven and Lisa walk off together because they have something in common! Maybe they're pairing them off to leave the show together. Robin takes Patrick's money.

Sam and Johnny argue some more about the same thing. Johnny finally turns to leave but Sam calls out one last thing. She tells Johnny that Claudia cared about him deeply and wouldn't want this for him.

Kristina tells Keifer that she can't trust him. Kiefer cliches that he's changed and it won't happen again and blah blah blah. He invites her to a party. She finally submits and says they can go to a movie. He leaves and Ethan comes in. Keifer sees him and Kristina talking.

'Dawson', the federal prosecutor is being warned at the PCPD by Mac but Dawson thinks it's all good. Claire interrupts and introduces herself to Mac. She wants a moment alone with 'Everett'. She informs him that she's taking over the Corinthos case by blackmailing him and she's got evidence. Love her!

Alexis just wants to help. Diane says Alexis thinks she's too good to defend mobsters and says everyone deserves a lawyer "with the exchange of a generous retainer." Hee. Alexis doesn't want to defend someone who she knows is guilty. Diane, "And yet here you sit." Alexis says she's doing this for Kristina. Diane continues to nag Alexis about joining her firm: "Look at me! Do I look like a woman who takes no for an answer?" Sonny comes in looking more like a business man than a mobster. He wants to know what Alexis is doing there. She tells him that he needs to convince Diane to have her help with his defense.
Miller and Davis, attorneys at law. Can I watch that show?

Epiphany is in a good mood and gives Lisa whatever she wants! Robin and Lisa and Patrick and Steven all talk about bets and connections and making out and closets and Tim McGraw and it's a date! Between Lisa and Steven.

Jason is playing a video game to distract Michael but Michael isn't a kid. And they talk about compromise and responsibility and I have a stomach ache. Michael thinks Sonny has no faith in him.

Sonny is surprised that Alexis is there and she says she's doing it for Kristina. Claire comes in all pompous and introduces herself to Diane. "I look forward to putting your client behind bars." Right in front of Sonny! Who else thinks Claire will be knocked up by Sonny in three months?

Kristina and Ethan play cards at Kelly's. He's teaching her to play poker. They talk about tells and Lady Gaga songs. Oh wait, poker face is more than just a song. It's an anthem! Sam walks in.

Jason and Michael and oh God I'm so bored. And even if you haven't seen the episode, you know what happens.

Diane and Alexis whisper about Claire. They're worried about her. Court is now in session! The judge looks mean! He reads the charges and Sonny makes his plea. Claire immediately jumps in saying that Sonny is a flight risk and asks the judge to revoke bail and that Sonny should be put in custody.

-end

February 23 2010

Maxie's hair pays a visit to Dante's hospital room. She wants to know if he really loves Lulu or if he's just a player "like [his] dad".

Luke tells Ethan that it's OK to be adventurous but not to indulge in compulsive risky behavior like putting yourself in the middle of a shootout. Lulu comes in. She was called by Tracy on Luke's behalf so he'd talk to her about Dante.

Johnny and Olivia have finished doin' the deed. He gives her a sparkly necklace but she's skeptical. She wants to know where he got it.

Jason tells Lucky that the shipment was one of his. Lucky is confident that he'll handle the situation, "unless of course, I get there first".

New GH credits - and for the first time that I'm aware of, it shows their names - both the actors and the characters! Sweet! I know there was at least one version that had the characters names. Amongst the new faces are Michael and Kristina who appear after Alexis. JJ as Lucky is now on, as is Dante, Ethan, Olivia, Johnny, Ephiphany and Matt. Matt - who has barely had a story line since he started. Luke of course is last. Hopefully, this will be easier to update in the future. The new look is a bit jarring but on the whole, I approve. BTW, no Steven or Lisa.

Jason hides a bullet casing in his jeans while Lucky questions him. Lucky thinks at first that Jason is stone walling him again, but Jason says he really doesn't know who would do this. Then he tells Lucky of Ethan's involvement in the shooting.

Johnny attempts to put the necklace on Olivia but she wants to know how he can afford it. She's uncomfortable taking something bought with crime money and...do you know who you're dating, Olivia?

Tracy assures Lulu that she waited to bring this up until she knew Dante was going to be OK. She gives Lulu a backhanded compliment referring to Dante as a "man who claims to love you." Lulu, of course, gets defensive and says Dante does love her. Tracy, like Maxie did to Dante earlier, refers to Sonny as a comparison. I guess this episode has a theme. She tries to get Luke in on it but he says it's all her. She again brings up the 'Dante is to Sonny as Ethan is to Luke' SAT question and the camera cuts to the father and son both taking a drink at the same time.

Dante doesn't want to have this silly conversation. Maxie starts grilling him about past relationships. Dante says it's none of her business. She thinks he has a talent for lying "like [his] dad". He doesn't want to be compared to Sonny.

Dante makes it clear that he is nothing like his father and if anything, he's going to use Sonny's life as "a roadmap of what not to do." Maxie brings up her 'mom issues' and says despite that, she's still a lot like her mom. I miss Felicia.

Lulu argues that Dante isn't Sonny. Tracy argues that they have the same DNA. And Luke? 'sides with Lulu. However, he still has an issue with Dante being a cop which I don't really get since his son is a cop.

The phone rings at Chez Davis. Alexis picks up the phone. It's Keifer. Before Kristina can stop her, Alexis lets slip that Kristina is there but is able to get out of it. After hanging up, she asks Kristina if they had a fight. Kristina lies and says that she's just busy. Diane comes by with a bottle of wine to vent about Sonny but she doesn't see Kristina until it's too late. Kristina excuses herself but not before she tells Diane that she hopes she loses the case since she thinks her dad deserves to rot in prison. Alexis tells Diane that she thinks something besides that is bothering her. Diane is glad "not to be a parent". Hee. Diane vents a bit about Sonny and thinks Alexis needs to get involved.

Johnny and Olivia talk and eat in post-coital bliss. She's worried about Dante but she also feels relief that everything is out in the open.

Spinelli wants to help Sam prepare her testimony but it takes him about thirty seconds to say that the way he talks. I wonder if they have one person that writes for Spinelli or if the writers have fun writing for him. He warns her that she could be convicted of perjury. Sam: "Can't wait." Translation: "My only purpose in life is to be used for mob purposes." Jason comes in and hijacks Spinelli because his problems are more important than Sam's. He wants Spinelli to get security footage from Pier 52.

Alexis doesn't want to represent criminals but Diane insists her law firm represents more than criminals citing Kate as an example. Diane informs her that Kate and Mode-lite have become exclusive clients. Alexis still doesn't want to join but says she's available for advice if Diane needs it. Diane is frustrated with Sonny and explains his plan about claiming self-defense. She pleads for Alexis' help.

Dante argues for the side of nurture in the nature vs. nurture debate. Maxie finally concedes but warns him not to hurt Lulu.

Lulu is with Dante because of how he treats her and not his profession. Luke accepts that but then defends Sonny's love life to Tracy. Tracy and Lulu continue to argue. Tracy wonders why Dante lied about Sonny shooting him. She never gives an answer. She appreciates Tracy's concern but wants her to stay out of it. Lucky comes in and Lulu thinks he's there to join in on the 'stay away from Dante' debate but Lucky says he actually likes Dante. This surprises and delights Lulu. She gives her brother a hug and leaves. Lucky asks Ethan about the hijack on pier 52.

Spinelli deduces that Johnny was at the pier and seemed to want to be caught. They both feel for Johnny but wonder why he'd be disloyal to Jason and Sonny. Sam thinks Johnny might have a death wish, but Spinelli wonders if his motive is revenge.

Olivia loves her necklace. They flirt some more but are interrupted by a knock at the door. Olivia opens the door to Jason. He's looking for Johnny. Jason throws him the shell casing saying, "You left this when you hijacked our shipment tonight."

Jason seems sympathetic to Johnny's actions. He knows that Johnny is probably being reckless because of what happened to Claudia but he says if things interfere with his business, than he'll have to take action. Johnny wonders why Jason is so loyal to Sonny and says Sonny has to pay for what he did. Jason threats, "Sorry to hear that." He leaves.

Maxie arrives at Jason's to Spinelli and gives Maxie a big kiss. She tells Spin that she's worried about Lulu and that she visited Dante at the hospital. She's glad she has Spinelli.

Alexis and Diane discuss the strategies of the case. They bring up Carly who Alexis deems as 'reckless.' Diane sees that Alexis can't help her (since she doesn't really know the whole truth about the case) so she leaves, but not before tempting her one last time to join her firm by showing off the bag that Kate sent her.

Ethan tells Lucky what happened at Pier 52. Lucky knows that Ethan and Luke know more than they're telling. Luke: "You know the rules." Lucky: "And I wouldn't have it any other day." With that, he leaves. Aw.

Lulu is back at Dante's room. She immediately asks him if he's ever lied to her. He thinks this has something to do with Maxie but Lulu didn't know she was there. Dante fills her in. Lulu tells Dante about her conversation with Tracy. She talks about how she's seen Carly suffer through the charm and heartbreak that is Sonny. Dante wonders if Lulu worries that he'll turn into his dad.

Dante says it's ok if she thinks that. Lulu says she's "relationship-challenged" and wonders if he's too good to be true. Basically she's being a girl. Dante has an idea. He says he'll teach Lulu all the ways to tell if someone is lying as he learned training to be a cop and she can ask him any question she wants. She thinks that's a great idea but asks, "How do I know you're not lying about the tell-tale signs?" Hee.

Kristina gives Alexis a hug and apologizes for snapping at her earlier. Alexis 'gets it'. Kristina wants to plan a shopping trip for the next day but Alexis has to work.

Olivia gives Johnny back the necklace because she doesn't want to walk around town with something that was bought by "pissing Sonny and Jason off." Johnny refuses to take it back. Olivia doesn't want to get involved in mob stuff...which... Ok. As much as I love Olivia and Johnny together, she's kind of a hypocrite for getting involved with yet another mobster. Johnny vows to get revenge on Sonny but Olivia thinks he's just going to get himself killed. He leaves.

Luke asks Ethan why he's protecting Johnny Zacchara. Ethan says he's not and that he told Lucky the truth. Luke and Tracy argue some more about his ability to be a father. Tracy walks out, offended that her opinion isn't valued.

Jason and Lucky meet up again at the pier. Jason tells Lucky that it was Johnny who took the shipment.

Luke doesn't want Ethan to get involved with the mob but Ethan insists he's a "lover, not a fighter." Luke doesn't quite believe him and warns him to at least think it through before getting involved.

Johnny meets his dad at prison. He wants Anthony to get in touch with the Escobars. Anthony doesn't think it'll be that easy to get the Escobars to switch sides but Johnny's not interested in advice. He tells him to help and not argue. Anthony is impressed by Johnny's fortitude and ferociousness.

Lucky wants to know why Jason has given up Johnny so easily. Jason says he respects Johnny and understands why he's doing what he's doing. From Jason's answer, Lucky intuits that he wants the cops to arrest Johnny before Jason has to kill him.

The lying game: Lulu goes over the tell-tale signs that Dante has taught her. They flirt a little. She starts off with a few silly questions including, "Boxers or Briefs". Her final question is "Do you love me?" Dante says no, but he uses a few of the tell-tale signs of lying so it's all cute and romantic and puppies are singing Christmas carols.

-end

February 22 2010

Olivia sympathizes with Sonny's need to be a father but she says she owes him nothing and it's Dante's choice. Sonny doesn't get it.

Dante talks his way out of the situation he's in and Jason pretty much lets him. Dante assumes that Sonny told Jason not kill him and Jason confirms that that was Sonny's order....also confirming to a cop that his boss gives orders to kill or not to kill. Smart. Jason thinks that Dante should show some respect and gratitude to the man who shot him. I mean his dad.

Nikolas tells Crazy that he can't turn his feelings off. Crazy says it's tearing her up inside.

Post-Accident: Maxie is pissed that "some maniac" drove her off the road before she realizes it was Lucky.

Credits: One more day! Wouldn't it have made more sense for it to happen on a Monday?

Maxie tells Lucky that the accident was party her fault too due to the texting and the calling... Lucky says he was speeding too fast. He tells her about his recent visit with Elizabeth. Is this important right now? Maxie points out the huge gash on his forehead. He doesn't want to go to the hospital so Maxie drags him along with her.

Crazy tells Nikolas that she chose Lucky. She informs Nik that Lucky forgave her. Nikolas wonders if the determination she has to be with Lucky stems more from guilt then love. She admits that she has guilt. She wants him to go so she get better. Nikolas brings up the baby and says that it needs both parents.

Back on Pier 52, thanks to budugly, I found out that Ethan didn't say "Zacchara connection" but "cigar connection." Thanks, man. The correction makes the scene no less surreal as Max and Milo try to get Ethan out of there. Meanwhile, Johnny has left. Milo finally gets Ethan out of there and Max finds a bullet casing in the fake-ass-snow.

Sonny goes on about Olivia's lies which is nothing compared to Sonny's murder habit. He wishes he had a chance with Dante and thinks he was cheated. He says that the damage is on her. She says the damage is in Dante's chest in the form of a bullet wound. Sonny brings up the tired old excuse that he wouldn't have shot him had he known because murder is only OK when it's not your son. Olivia is proud of the man she raised and doubts that he would be the same if Sonny had raised him. That might be a fun fantasy episode.

Jason tells Dante about how Sonny found out and says that Sonny still believed in him. He brings up all the times that he helped out Dante. He seems more mad at himself that he can't tell who is a liar anymore. Dante admits he fell for the "mobster with a heart of gold" routine up until he got shot. Jason wonders what Dante expected. And that's the whole problem, isn't it? Mob life is all Jason has ever known so he's so convinced that it's right. Which seems to answer Olivia's question from earlier about how Dante would have turned out had he been raised by Sonny because technically Jason was raised by Sonny. Sonny was the one who taught him right from wrong especially after Robin was out of the picture. Dante asks Jason if He would have done the same thing as Sonny. Lulu walks in at this point and says she wonders the same thing.

Lulu tells Jason that she was wrong about Sonny. Jason defends Sonny and admits that he was supposed to kill Dante. Dante says that the fact that Sonny is his father doesn't change anything. Jason leaves telling Dante that like it or not, Sonny is not giving up on him. Dante tells Lulu that he's scared he'll never be free of Sonny.

Ethan comes back to the Haunted Star and Luke wants to know what happened to his Cubans. Ethan tells Luke what happened with the shooting. Tracy thinks Luke should tell Sonny about it. Ethan isn't too bothered by what happened. He had fun.

Maxie's pad where she is cleaning up Lucky's wound: He's uncertain that she knows what he's doing but she reminds him of her days at GH as a candy striper. But of course those days remind them both of the harm they caused Elizabeth way back when. Lucky thinks it's good that he's reminded of that. Maxie says that nobody is perfect. Lucky agrees saying if he was perfect, he could forgive Elizabeth.

Crazy just wants to get better with Lucky's help. Nikolas says that odds are that the baby is his and she needs his help too. Crazy: "So you think that staking a claim to this baby is like staking a claim to me?" Crazy talks about how he pretty much ignores his first kid. She's saying what we're all thinking!

Lucky phones his tow friend about his car. Maxie brings him vitamin C which she learned from Spinelli will help. Lucky wonders if she's happy with Spinelli and he's glad when she says she is. Maxie wishes that it were the same for him and Elizabeth. He guesses that she still doesn't like Elizabeth. Maxie admits she doesn't but likes him. Maxie says they saw the worst in each other and she wants to know he can come talk to her if he needs to. He informs her that Liz is preggers. He says he told Elizabeth that he forgives her but can't get all the rage and anger out of his head every time he looks at her. Maxie says it's time he starts being truthful.

Tracy says Ethan should have just gotten out of there but Ethan enjoyed himself. Luke tells Ethan to stay out of it because he and Sonny have an arrangement. Tracy wonders what good that does when Sonny's thugs are shooting at Ethan. Ethan reminds them that no one shot at him. Tracy can't let it go and brings up that Sonny's son is now dating his daughter. Johnny walks in with a wad of cash and wants to play blackjack. He wants Ethan to be his dealer.

Sonny tells Jason what happened with Max/Milo/Ethan and asks Jason to check it out because he wants to get through to Dante.

Lulu plays nurse and puts Dante back to bed, mock-yelling at him. Dante agrees to to rest if she promises to stay by his side. She knows he's worried about the trial. He insists he's going to tell the truth.

Luke ensures his Cubans delivery by phone. Tracy wants to talk about Lulu. He says her personal life is her business. Tracy insists that Lulu is in danger since Dante is Sonny's son. He says that Dante wasn't raised by Sonny but Tracy says that Ethan wasn't raised by Luke either and they're alike. Meanwhile at the table, Johnny says the house won even though he won. The money he gives Ethan is a thank-you gift for his interference on the docks.

Jason tells Sonny he talked to Dante. Jason thinks he's more of a threat than ever since he has Sonny's protection but Sonny is diluted in thinking that everything is going to be all right.

Nikolas is still at the room in Shadybrook when Crazy comes back from her session. She just wants to take a nap but Nikolas starts talking about Helena's presence at Shadybrook. Crazy informs him that Helena makes donations to Shadybrook and can control her treatment. Nikolas says he'll make sure that she doesn't interfere. Wouldn't it just be easier to just move her to another facility? Crazy tells Nikolas what he already knows about Helena wanting to groom her baby to be the Cassadine heir. Again, she brings up that Spencer sees his nanny more than his father. Nikolas thinks they can find out the paternity sooner than they thought.

Lucky doesn't know if he loves or hates Elizabeth. He doesn't know how he can get passed Nik and Liz having sex for months. Maxie brings up her own experience and the potential revenge sex that Spinelli didn't partake in. Maxie and her weird hair thinks he needs to stop lying to Elizabeth. He gets interrupted by a text from work to get down to Pier 52. He welcomes the distraction and thanks Maxie for her help before he leaves.

Jason examines the bullet holes/casings at Pier 52 when Lucky shows up. Lucky says the PCPD could use a man like him. As if! He informs Jason about Liz's pregnancy and Nikolas' possible paternity.

Crazy knows the test that Nikolas means and it holds a high risk for the baby. He insists that it will help her piece of mind. She tells him not to pressure her and kicks him out. Before he leaves, he tells Elizabeth, "the baby will be a blessing no matter who's it is".

Luke doesn't want to get involved in Lulu's love life but Tracy thinks that he needs to. Luke sees the wad of cash that Johnny gave Ethan. He wants to know what's going on.

Johnny stops by Olivia's. He kisses her passionately but Olivia thinks something is going on. He insists that she's the only person that he still cares about. He says he's not lying to her about anything and wants to know if she has anything left she needs to say. She says she doesn't. They make out.

Dante is out of bed when Sonny stops by. He's glad Dante is making progress. Dante says he's so arrogant but nothing is going to change just because Sonny is acting remorseful. He gets angry when Sonny tries to explain and can't believe that Sonny is still trying to talk his way out of it. Sonny, "You gonna tell me you didn't wish who you're father was growing up? Maybe you blame me cause I wasn't there?" Dante, "I thank God, that you weren't there". Sonny tells him that Dante reminds him of himself and than proceeds to list all the wonderful things about...himself. Dante says they're nothing alike. Sonny says they're blood as if that means anything. It means something when it suits him. Michael isn't blood but it doesn't matter and Dante is blood and it matters. So really what does blood mean?

Ethan tells Luke about what happened on the pier. He says it was accidental.

Jason wants to help with Lucky and Elizabeth. He's worried about what will happen to Jake. Lucky reassures Jason that no matter what, he'll continue to be Jake and Cameron's father. With that out of the way, Lucky wants to get to work. Lucky, "How does this go? I interrogate you and you stone wall me, right? Want to get started?" Hee. Jason in a straight non-committed line-reading, "I just happened to be passing by". Double hee! Lucky thinks that someone is trying to start a mob war and wants to work with Jason. Jason surprises him by saying he agrees.

Olivia and Johnny go at it.

Maxie is working on a piece for Crimson when Lulu walks in. Lulu, "want to hear my problems?" Maxie, "Want to hear why pink capris are making a come back?" Hee! This episode is full of fun zingers. Lulu doesn't want to talk about pink capris. She's all mixed up because she hates Sonny yet she knows Dante wants to have a relationship with his father deep down and she's afraid of blurting her true feelings out more than she already has.

Sonny informs Dante that he is under his protection. Dante doesn't care. He tells Sonny that they're complete opposites. He doesn't want anything to do with Sonny and tells him to stop. Sonny says that his anger and refusal to forgive is just like him and God damn it, he's totally right. He leaves on that note.

-end

I'm excited for the much-anticipated new credits tomorrow, y'all.

February 19 2010

Sorry so late!

Jason and Diane try to argue with Sonny that pleading self-defense would be the stupidest thing known to man. Their points are incredibly valid and coherent but Sonny is a stubborn asshole who wants to do things his way. They bring up that Carly and Sam's testimonies will be a lie on top of a lie but Sonny insists "they can swing it." He really is such an asshole. He's not only attempting to do something that will be difficult for him to do but he's burdening countless people, not to mention endangering their lives. Jason and Diane try one more time but Sonny angrily cuts them off. Because he's a dick.

Carly expects Dante to get out of law enforcement and help Sonny because she's a diluted cunt. What kills me about all of this - the whole Sonny and Carly self-entitled hypocrisy crap is that they're still considered the good-guys. The mobster and the mobster's ex-wife with hearts of gold. And it's pretty clear that Dante is in the right here but we all know who will win in the end because TPTB can't have their precious Sonny lose. It's really disgusting and makes me just want to stop watching this show.

Luke is at Wyndemere. He wants to know why no one told him Helena was back. Nik says this is not about a Cassadine/Spencer war. This is about him, Elizabeth and Lucky.

At Crazy's hospital room, Lucky still has a gun pointed at Helena. She takes it in stride knowing he has no power at Shadybrook. She laughs that Lucky is still playing the hero despite Elizabeth's trampiness and that he's still trying to protect her despite the fact that she's carrying the Cassadine heir.

New Credits Countdown: 4 days! (or...2 days from this post)

Helena tells Lucky that she should be relieved. She reiterates that Elizabeth is pregnant with Nikolas' baby. Lucky says that the baby could be his but Helena insists that it's possible but not probable since Nik and Liz have been sleeping together for months. Helena talks about their Elizabeth and Lucky's love being dead and brings up his drug using. Lucky says he'll take care of Elizabeth no matter what the paternity result is. Helena says Elizabeth will then just run into the arms of another "Mr. Wonderful". All the while, Lucky has a gun in her face and she doesn't even flinch. Nice. She finally leaves and Lucky comforts Crazy Girl.

Luke says that once Helena is involved, he joins in the fight. Nikolas thinks Luke feels guilt that he stopped looking for Lucky when he thought he was dead. Luke warns Nikolas not to mess with his family and leaves.

Johnny is talking on his cell making plans to take over Pier 52 when Maxie comes in with what looks like...a mullet? *shudder* She wants him to take a look at Kate's car because there is a 'ping'. Johnny tells Maxie that his garage is a front for what he really does and he's not going to hide it anymore. Isn't this the time where you really need to hide it?

Dante thinks Carly has "some nerve". As do I. Carly thinks it's all about lying to her kids. Dante explains he's a cop and puts criminals away and...I don't know why he has to explain that. Carly says that Claudia was a criminal and she's been brought to justice. She is so diluted but she has one valid point which is Dante didn't tell the cops that Sonny shot him. Dante says Michael and Morgan will be be better off. Carly: without a father? Dante says that Sonny takes fathers away from their kids every day. Carly gets desperate now saying that Sonny won't last in jail and begs him to lie. Olivia comes in and hears this last part and becomes momma bear again. She warns Carly not to tell her son to lie. Why not? They're all liars in this room. It's like a national past time.

Seriously, Maxie's hair looks horrible. Maxie still wants Johnny to fix Kate's car. Johnny explains his deal. Again, why is he telling Maxie all this? Shouldn't he start keeping things a bit confident? But Johnny seems to want to justify everything he's about to do. He wants to make Sonny pay for what he did to Claudia. Maxie tells him that people who cross Sonny don't have a very high life expectancy but if he's going to do this, he needs to be sneaky about it. Thank you, Maxie. Johnny insists that he's going to destroy Sonny.

Sonny/Jason. Blah blah blah blah blah. Same old arguments. Nothing changes. No one can convince Sonny of anything.

Olivia rips Carly a new one. They all bring up all the lies that everyone's told. And coulda woulda shoulda. Carly finally leaves. But then Dante says that Carly was right about one thing. "You want everyone to tell the truth but you still keep on lying."

Lulu catches Ethan stealing some cash from the safe at the Haunted Star but says it's ok; that Luke expects it. If only all jobs were like that. Ethan tells Lulu that Luke went to Wyndemere. She's been caught up with Dante so she hasn't heard the latest about Elizabeth being pregnant which Ethan gladly tells her. Lulu's expression: Awww shit.

Lucky tells Crazy that he'll keep Helena away from her. She says that Helena was right, that he has no obligation to her. He says he won't leave her alone and will do whatever it takes to keep her safe...because he's Lucky and he always does the noble thing. Whether it's stupid or not.

Olivia and Dante both agree that Carly has guts and wants to protect her kids but Olivia says she isn't going to help Carly's kids if it affects hers. Dante snarks that at least Carly never lied to her kids about what their dad does and Olivia goes apeshit rightfully saying, "And look how that turned out for everybody. Do you see what those kids have been through?" She lists the countless things that have happened to Sonny's kids. Dante: "At least Michael knew the truth". Olivia brings up the coma. She has no regrets keeping the secret. Dante hates that he had to grow up thinking his mom was a slut because she didn't know who his father was. He now thinks the reason she never had any boyfriends is because she's still in love with Sonny. She says she's in love with what Sonny used to be. She insists that she gave him a good life that wasn't surrounded by violence. He wonders if she wants him to tank the case. She just wants him to tell the truth on the stand. Like she did at the police station?

Lulu: 'Pregnant...huh...and I'm sure she doesn't know who the father is?" Ethan drops the other bomb that Elizabeth is in Shadybrook. Lulu isn't surprised and thinks she's in there so Lucky and Nikolas can 'save her'. She thinks Elizabeth will come out of it smelling like roses. Ethan wants to know how it's any of her concern and Lulu says that Elizabeth is tearing her family apart. Luke comes in, happy to see his daughter. Ethan leaves them alone. Lulu snarks to her dad about Elizabeth some but Luke steers the conversation back to Lulu's life. She tells him that Dante is recovering. He thinks that she should concentrate on that but she's worried about Lucky. Luke: It's all good.

Crazy wants to know why Lucky still loves her. He thinks he should have been listening more closely. They both blame themselves back and forth and it's sad and sweet and pathetic all rolled into one. He wants her to get better and says he won't turn his back on her now. She wants to know if he forgives her.

Carly is still at the hospital and runs into Jason. She tells him she was trying to talk to Dante. Jason: "Dante's a cop and you can't trust that guy." And that, ladies and gentleman sums up the fucked up General Hospital way of thinking. She thinks that Dante can be convinced. Jason is worried and Carly thinks it'll all be OK.

Helena is back at Wyndemere. Nikolas wonders if she's seen Luke yet but she hasn't. Nikolas says that Luke thinks the Spencers and the Cassadines are now at war and Helena laughs it off. He wants to know if that's why she's back, to brew things up between the families. She says she saw this all happening months ago. She's just glad that he has produced an heir.

Lucky avoids Crazy's question by talking about his addiction. He says everything is going to be fine and that they're still a family but he never actually says he forgives her. She hugs him and he hesitantly wraps his arms around her. She asks him again if he forgives her. He pauses for a moment and then finally says he does. But I don't believe it.

Helena finally visits Luke at the Haunted Star and it's like walking into the lion's den. Luke kinda takes it in stride reminding Helena of the three months he was held captured. Helena says it was all a misunderstanding. He thinks it was a mistake bringing her back from the island and says he's made a lot of mistakes when it comes to her. Helena says, "Almost...like being in love." Luke: "Almost." Hee. These two need to get it on. She brings up Lucky and he threatens that if she harms Lucky (which includes Elizabeth), he'll have to "end [their] cat and mouse game". She's totally turned on. She has no intention of harming Lucky and wants to make his life easier by claiming Elizabeth's child and leaving Lucky to be free. Luke wonders how much simpler life would be for everyone if he just snapped her neck. Helena: "Well, that's an option." She thinks they have nothing to fight about and they're on the same side. They drink to that.

Carly wants to know what happens to Jason if Sonny leaves the country. He says he'll have to take over and Dante will come after him.

Lulu finds Dante's bed empty.

Olivia goes to Sonny's to tell him to keep his people away from Sonny. Sonny isn't surprised by Carly's proposed plans. Olivia thinks Dante has suffered enough. Sonny, "Yeah he has - but not because of me. Because of you." Wow. He's got some gaul. He says she's lied to Dante from the start and needs to own that. Yep. It's all Olivia's fault that Sonny shot Dante. *sigh*

Shooting at Pier 52! Max and Milo behind the crates on the left and Johnny behind the crates on the right. And then Ethan walks in and it's all so surreal. He stops the shooting by talking. He tells Max and Milo that he's shooting at his "Zachara connection." Did that just happen?

Sonny: Boring Boring Nonsense. Olivia: "Are you freaking kidding me?". Sonny yells about not getting a chance to raise his son. Olivia doesn't regret a thing. Sonny starts crying.

Dante is out on the roof when Jason walks in. He came out there to get some fresh air but now hints that Jason could throw him off to shut him up for good.

Crazy rocks in her rocking chair. Nikolas knocks and comes in. She snarks that she's had too much company today. Nikolas goes to leave but Crazy tells him about Helena. She wants to know how Helena knows about the baby. They talk of regret and Nikolas says he's still in love with her.

Lucky is on the road, speeding. Maxie is also on the road in Kate's car blue-toothing to Kate. She takes her eyes off the road to check her cell phone. They both swerve off the road. DUN!

-end

February 18 2010

Let's get to it:

Sonny wants to get to know Dante before he goes to prison. Olivia says it's not up to her. He is 'just askin' her for help to get to know his son. Except he says it in this pretty douchey, 'I am king of the world', 'everyone should do everything I say' way.

Also askin' for favors? Morgan. He wants Dante to keep Sonny out of prison. But he's more adorable about it. Dante says he can't do it. They're interrupted by Jason who was apparently summoned by Morgan. Morgan has an idea. He thinks Dante should work for Sonny for real! Oh, kid.

Lucky wonders to his dad if he's the reason that Elizabeth is in Shadybrook. Luke doesn't think so and believes Lucky acted perfectly reasonable. Lucky thinks he should just tell Elizabeth he'll be there for her and the boys to get her through the crisis. Luke thinks that's a bad idea.

Helena(!) was disappointed that Liz is carrying Nikolas' baby. Liz wants to know how Helena knew. Helena: "I know everything". Hee! She continues to insult (compliment?) Liz and at one point says, "You're a liar. You'd lie down for anyone". Nice pun, Helena! Meanwhile Liz is crazily playing with her coat's belt. Helena is happy that Liz was able to accomplish something she was never able to do: put a riff between Lucky and Nikolas. She wants to be friends and says she hopes the baby will develop Liz's mean streak. Liz despises her and says she will never get near her child. Helena: "And who do you suppose will stop me?" Evil!

Credits

Liz crazies for a bit yelling for Helena to get out. This fuels Helena's case when an orderly comes in to see Liz acting crazy and Helena acting completely calm. It helps that Shadybrook is funded in a large part by Helena and she has people there working for her. Awesome.

Luke thinks that only Elizabeth can help herself and it will only hurt if Lucky tries to be the hero. Lucky insists that he and Elizabeth are over but needs to help for Cameron and Jake's sake. Luke thinks about the new baby pondering the question we're all thinking: "Haven't you had your fill yet, of raising other men's children?" True dat, home slice.

Alexis is at Wyndemere. She's happy he called her to be her attorney. He recaps the last few months in a few sentences. He wants to make sure he protects his legal rights to the child that is probably his.

Sonny whines like a baby. Olivia doesn't buy it. He thinks she owes him which proves he still has no idea why she hid Dante's paternity to begin with. Sonny thinks shared blood means something. Olivia, "To you." Sonny begs her one more time to help out. Olivia says it's up to Dante and she won't force him.

Morgan tries to convince Jason and Dante of his plan. They try to carefully explain the deal but Morgan doesn't really get it. After Morgan leaves, Dante makes it clear to Jason that he's not going to protect Sonny.

Carly visits Jason but he's not there. Sam lets her in. She informs Sam of Sonny's new plea and tells her that they need to lie to the police that they lied in their original statement which they did....so they're lying with a new lie to replace the old lie. For fuck's sake. Carly has a brainstorm but we don't hear it yet.

Luke and Lucky discuss baby daddy drama. Lucky won't raise the new kid if it's not his but he still cares too much about Cameron and Jake. Luke wants him to think it through before he makes a bad situation worse.

Liz crazily looks out the window and imagines Lucky, Nikolas and Jason seeing her in a vegetative Laura state in that big white rocking chair. Dream Lucky says all of Cameron's friends call her "crazy slut". Ohhh...that may be the next great moniker. She imagines them saying some more awful stuff and when she breaks out of it, she sinks to the floor continuing the crazy.

Sonny is on the phone with (Diane) and she's still arguing the plea. Let it go, girl. Sonny says to get it done and he has better things to do. What a douchey douche. Morgan comes in. Sonny says when it gets nicer, he wants to take Morgan and Michael out on the boat. Morgan suggests that Dante come along. Sonny doesn't think that will happen. Morgan explains his plan to Sonny. Sonny tells him it won't work.

Sam is packing up the V-day stuff when Jason comes in. She tells him about Carly stopping by. He tells her that Dante wants nothing to do with Sonny and he wonders if he might be in the exact same situation one day with Jake.

Patrick visits Crazy Slut who is still on the floor. He pops a squat next to her. She wants Patrick to tell her that he's real. Patrick makes a cute joke about being too good to be true which seems to snap CS out of it. He tells her that he and Robin both care about her very much. He thinks she's brave for committing herself.

Lucky has been summoned to Wyndemere by NIkolas. He makes some cracks about the place and Nikolas. Nikolas tells him that he hired Alexis to make sure that the child's rights are protected. Lucky thinks that means Nikolas is going to take away the baby but Nikolas says that when Elizabeth is better, he wants to marry her. My eyes roll into the back of my head as I imagine Nikolas with four kids that he'll ignore.

Sonny tries to explain why Morgan's plan won't work. Morgan thinks that sons are supposed to do what their dads tell them. Sonny explains that Dante is a grown man and...seriously. Is this kid retarded now? Is he five years old with no concept of reality? I thought he was supposed to be smart. Sonny says he's proud of Dante even though they disagree on what's right. Here's a list of what Sonny believes is right from his own mouth: "To have the courage of his convictions, respect, loyalty, when you give your word, you keep it, you protect your family and people you love". Murder isn't listed.

Jason guilts himself about Jake and Michael. Sam tells Jason about Sonny's plea plan.

Lucky's all, "say what?" Lucky thinks that Nikolas is being stupid. Nikolas says if he's the kids father, he's not going anywhere. And ultimately it's Elizabeth's choice.

CS loves that Patrick and Robin can talk and share. CS asks Patrick how he'd feel if Robin cheated on him with his brother. Patrick says he'd be hurt but everyone's human....and I think he's just being nice. Patrick says she just needs to concentrate on himself. She hugs him and he leaves. Helena comes in and accuses her of throwing herself at yet another man.

Diane is worried about her retainer and her shoe budget. Hee. But seriously, she's worried. Sonny plans out Carly and Sam's defenses and it's all a lot of work and relying on a lot of people to lie. For someone who chides Olivia for lying every chance he gets, he's certainly expecting a lot of people to lie for him. Diane, Sam, Jason, Dante, Carly - the list goes on.

Carly makes a surprise visit to Dante's room. I guess this is her brainstorm.

Dante snarks that he's sorry he couldn't make it to the christening but he had a fresh bullet wound in his chest. Carly says a lot of people are going to be affected by all this including Lulu. Dante quickly makes it known that Lulu is not open for discussion. Carly thinks he used Morgan and he needs to make it right. Dante says that he'd do it all again and no matter what he does now, Sonny will go to prison. Carly suggest that he could lie to the cops that he falsified the evidence.

Diane goes over the non-facts of the case. They make up the entire story before our eyes. It's all so pathetic. Jason walks in and overhears the last part. He tells Sonny that he can't let him do that.

Wyndemere: Luke comes in, ready to attack. He wants to know if Nikolas knew that Helena was in town. He did. Luke knows that once Helena finds out about Elizabeth, she'll be planning something. He warns that if anything happens to any of his kids or Elizabeth, he'll "have to do something about it".

CS tells Helena that Patrick is a friend. Helena snarks that that's how it starts. She calls her a predator and the town tramp. Helena thinks she should get Elizabeth declared as an unfit mother. Lucky comes in, gun cocked, warning Helena to get away from CS or he'll blow her head off. Whoa!

-end

February 17 2010

Valentine's Day is finally over. Hurrah!

Sonny's ready to go out but Diane drops by. He wants to see Dante but Diane wants to talk about their case. Why, Diane? You know how stubborn he is.

Dante starts to get out of bed. Rayner comes in, thinking Dante's trying to undermine his own recovery to get out of testifying against Sonny.

The Haunted Star Valentine's party that we read about in the crumpled flier was apparently a hit according to Luke although we never got to see it. Tracy drops the bomb: Elizabeth is pregnant.

Speaking of Crazy Gal, she informs Lucky that she feels much better. Outside, Steven tells Nikolas that the room is ready at Shadybrook and asks if he's told Elizabeth yet. Shouldn't he tell her as her doctor and brother? Liz can't wait to get home. I just can't wait for the new credits.

Credits: 6 Days and counting.

Robin and Patrick argue about stupid things. Their Valentine's day didn't go very well.

Liz thinks it's all going to be OK. Lucky remains silent. Outside, Nikolas reassures Steven and himself. He softens the blow by calling her a wonderful mother. Sure. Finally he tells her about Shadybrook.

Traci tells Luke about the church and the hypothermia and the pregnant and the questionable paternity and the suicide attempt. Luke's kinda flabbergasted.

Sonny calls Diane a pain in the ass which she doesn't seem to mind. They bring up the same old arguments, for and against, and it's really all futile because we know who is going to win. And Diane makes great arguments because she's a lawyer but Sonny is so idiotic and stubborn that he can't wrap his mind around it. He thinks everything is going to be all right because the writers will write it that way.

Dante informs Rayner about his new job. Rayner is worried that Dante is going to continue to cover for his father. Dante seems to sincerely believe that it was his fault that he got shot. Rayner warns him one more time about lying on the witness stand as Olivia walks in. Olivia cuts him off threatening a lawsuit. Which? Shut up, Olivia.

Agent Rayner brings up the blackmail and Olivia brings up the lying and really? Pot, meet kettle. She threatens him again. And he informs Olivia that she'll be a witness. He warns her to tell the truth on the stand. Dante tells Rayner to back off Olivia or he'll "develop sentimental amnesia."

Hospital: Lisa's in a good mood. Patrick and Robin are in a pissy mood. They argue some more about stupid things as Lisa listens. Lisa brags that she had a good Valentine's day. Patrick thinks it's because she got laid.

Liz begs Lucky not to make her go and outside the room Nikolas and Steven talk about who should have told Elizabeth. Too late now... Steven thinks it's important that Elizabeth doesn't always see Lucky as her savior. Lucky convinces Elizabeth that committing herself is the best thing. Laura's chair is waiting, Elizabeth.

Lulu visits Dante. She's been working all morning for Kate. She jokes about how she almost killed him yesterday. He tells her about Rayner and court.

Steven talks to Robin about Elizabeth; about the hypothermia and the crazy and the pregnancy and the Shadybrook. Robin gets distracted by...

Lisa and Patrick chatting about some car race that Lisa went to. Patrick thinks Lisa slept with one of the drivers. Robin takes Elizabeth's recent crazy as an excuse to pull Patrick away.

Luke gets a visit from Sonny. Luke: "Kids, huh?" Sonny wants to know how Luke finally connected with Ethan. Luke: "Well I didn't shoot him in the chest, for one thing." HEE! Awesome, Luke. Awesome. He apologizes for his awesome joke. Why? Luke tells Sonny about Liz and the case of the two potential daddies. Sonny: "That's horrible." Really, Sonny? More horrible than shooting your own son in the chest?

Lucky tries to convince Liz to go to Shadybrook but Liz just wants to go home and ignore her kids. Lucky said that rehab worked for him...but Liz reminds him that he's still drinking. He says he's going to a meeting and if it doesn't work, he'll check himself into rehab as well. Liz rightly argues that rehab is different then being in the mental ward. She begs him not to make her go. Nikolas comes in. He too tries to convince her. Lucky says that the boys will be taken care of by him and Audrey. She finally agrees but makes it clear she is just doing it for her kids.

Sonny knows something about being mentally ill. His words. Sonny gives a PSA about bi-polar disorder. The more you know!

Robin comes in with Liz's clothes. Nik and Lucky leave them alone. Robin and Liz discuss Robin's struggle with the crazy last year. She gives Liz a little pep talk.

Lulu is on the phone with Maxie convincing her to cover a little while longer. Dante tells Lulu that he knows she has a life and doesn't expect her to be with him 24/7. Lulu likes caring and worrying about him. They make out and are interrupted by Michael. He says he's glad that Dante's ok and isn't just saying that because he wants a favor. Except he does.

Lulu, who by the way looks great in a silky cheetah-skin like dress, excuses herself but Michael says she can stay since Dante doesn't keep secrets from her and she knew he was undercover trying to bring Sonny down for months. Michael: "I thought you liked my dad". Lulu slyly avoids the question/accusation telling Michael that it must be hard for him. Michael defends Sonny that he makes mistakes and sometimes does the wrong things but for the right reasons. Geez, this kid is brainwashed. He tells Dante he's made mistakes as well. He talks about the night Claudia was murdered which makes Dante a bit suspicious. After Michael leaves, Dante tells Lulu about Michael confessing.

Olivia is at Sonny's meeting with Diane. She just wants Olivia to just tell the truth. Olivia says she will but then gives a fake version of the truth. Diane thinks her story is ridiculous. Sonny comes in and wonders what Olivia is doing there. Diane frustratedly leaves. Olivia wants to leave too but Sonny stops her. He needs help. ...with their son.

At the Drake/Scorpio household, Robin apologizes for being snarky. Patrick, too apologizes which leads them to the bedroom.

Steven escorts Liz to her room at Shadybrook. It looks remarkably like Laura's room complete with rocking chair. Steven encourages her that it's the right thing. She's convinced that her baby is Nikolas'.

Haunted Star office. Lucky visit's his dad. They talk about Elizabeth. He feels guilty about the nasty things he's said to Elizabeth. He wants to know why he still cares about her.

Sonny tries to guilt Olivia about keeping the secret but Olivia says she'd do it again. She doesn't want to intercede between Sonny and Dante.

Morgan visits Dante. Morgan is upset that his mom and Jax are splitting up. He's also upset about his dad going to jail. He wants Dante to help stop him Sonny from going to prison.

Luke tells Lucky to take things one day at a time and to not worry about what do to about Elizabeth until after she gets well.

Liz talks to her unborn child. Helena comes in and congratulates her for being a slut! Helena thinks it's great that she committed herself to Shadybrook and that she's carrying the Cassadine heir.

-end

February 16 2010

It's snowing again. Who wants to make a bet the show will be interrupted?

We begin with a special weather report. *sigh*

We miss most of the teaser and cut to Dr. Lee telling Elizabeth she's three months pregnant. Nikolas looks surprised. Lucky doesn't.

Credits

Elizabeth gets pissy with Dr. Lee but she handles it like a good doctor. Nikolas asks for a paternity test. Dr. Lee: We'll know by May sweeps. Lucky and Nikolas try to comfort her but she just wants to go to sleep.

Longest. Valentines Day. Ever. Jason and Sam feed each other chocolates and drink champagne. And eww...Molly and Kristina are watching. They claim they got trapped there when Sam and Jason came in.

Apparently in the teaser, Carly called Jax a playboy and he's insulted because unlike her, he never cheated in their marriage. He doesn't want to fight about who's the biggest slut; he just wants her to know that Josselyn will be staying with him. He seems to really want to make Carly mad because he brings up Carly leaving Michael with Jason when he was a baby.

And again, apparently in the teaser, Steven caught Dante and Lulu in bed together because he's reprimanding Dante now about it. Oh and mom and dad are there, too. Steven somewhat-jokes with Lulu that if she so much as kisses Dante again, she'll be banned from the ICU. Dante tells Olivia to get out and take Sonny with him.

Mac stops by Alexis' house with a present! He wants to be spontaneous. Aww. Alexis lets him in. They ramble about work and then he gives her the present and they both share in chocolatey goodness and even flirt a bit. I want to like these two together. Alexis deserves a good guy but I feel like GH is just throwing these two together because they're both old fuddy-duddys passed their prime. And they're not. They're a little older but they're both still sexy and vibrant and could stand to have passion in their lives. And these two just don't spark passion together. Plus with the amount of airtime these two generally get lately, a couple-hood will just throw them further into the wings.

Kristina and Molly flounce until Sam excuses them. Before she leaves, Molly tries to give Jason a 101 tutorial in romance and reveals that Milo helped by getting the champagne. It's about time Milo got some romance. I think Michael's available.

Carly is hurt and pissed that Jax would sink so low as the hurt her with something that was beyond her control just for the sake of hurting her. Jax apologizes but he's hurt because he knows their over.

Dante doesn't just want them to leave his room but leave the hospital. He goes on about how Sonny is using Olivia to get to him. Finally Lulu cuts everyone off and tells the Brooklyn Royalty that they need to back off.

Molly and Kristina come home with Jason and Sam to find Alexis and Mac making out. Alexis pathetically rambles that she was just thanking Mac for bringing her cookies. Molly and Kristina are thrilled, usher Sam and Jason out and then leave Alexis and Mac to continue "snogging", as Molly puts it. Hmm, my Mac doesn't recognize the word snogging. I guess it's not Brit-friendly.

The evil parents are gone so Dante and Lulu can continue to flirt. She reassures him saying she doesn't think that Olivia would go back to Sonny after what he did but Dante isn't so sure. They get back to flirting and she leaves with the promise that she'll return tomorrow.

Carly reluctantly agrees to leave Josselyn with Jax for the night. Jax apologizes again for being a dick. Carly leaves telling Jax that she expects a phone call in the morning telling her when to pick up Josselyn.

Steven just found out his sister's at the hospital. Lucky and Nikolas fill him in. Steven chides Nikolas for not wearing protection. Lucky's all 'don't even go there'. He just wants to concentrate on Elizabeth getting well.

Steven warns Nik and Lucky about Elizabeth's emotional state before they enter her hospital room. But she's not there!

She's out on the roof, playing with the fake-ass snow.

Olivia comes back into Dante's room and tells him about her guilt and remorse. She can't stay apart from him anymore. She admits she was an idiot for not telling him the truth last year when he first came to town.

An exhausted Lulu comes home and looks around the gaudiness that is her apartment. Not two seconds later, there is a knock at the door. It's Sonny. He patronizes that her anger will pass but she's pretty clear as to who he is. She informs him that she'll never forgive him for what he did.

Lucky finds Crazy Gal on the roof. She turns to him and says she's sorry. I rewound like three times and it's kinda hard to tell, but she's sitting on the ledge.

Now, it's easier to see: She's definitely sitting on the ledge. She whines that she's made a mess of everything. Yep. Lucky tries to talk her down while Steven and Nikolas show up. Steven stops Nikolas from interfering. Lucky tells Liz that he's made mistakes too. He continues to talk her down slowly creeping towards her. She finally takes his hand.

Sam is happy about Alexis and Mac. She and Jason 'I love you' each other. Sam refers to Molly's 'list'. Next: Read Sam poetry.

Carly tells the boys about Jax. Morgan totally breaks my heart yelling that he hates all that's been going on. He thinks Jax 'quit' them. He can't quit you, Morgan! Kids been watching too much Brokeback Mountain. Damn that movie tears me up. Carly hugs her son telling him she hates all this too. Michael just stands there.

Olivia can't stand it when Dante is this mad at her. Dante throws Olivia a bone telling her he loves her which I think she needed to hear but says he just doesn't want to talk to her right now. He's pissed that she lied and he's pissed that she's allowing Sonny back into her heart. Olivia protests too much. She explains away her secret that she didn't want Dante to ever follow into Sonny's footsteps like Michael is now doing. She says she feels bad for Sonny and Dante is surprised.

Sonny wants Lulu to hear him out. No, Lulu - it's a trap! Don't fall into the dimples! Shut the door! She doesn't hear me and let's him in. He wants her help to get to know his son. She thinks he's delusional. Sonny thinks Dante lied about the shooting because they're blood. Lulu informs him that Dante is the newest detective in the PCPD.

Instead of poetry, Jason reads from "Firearms" magazine. This gets Sam hot.

Lucky visits Elizabeth in her room. He tells her that thinks will be OK in the morning and leaves. He meets up with Steven and Nikolas who tell her that they put a call in to Lainey. They think that Elizabeth needs to be in ShadyBrook for more intense treatment. Lucky agrees.

Jax monologues to Josselyn. He admits to her that he was bluffing about the talk of divorce and custody and thinks this is the only way to make Carly fight for him.

Carly pretty much admits the same thing to Morgan. Michael doesn't think this will work.

Olivia is about to leave when Sonny arrives. He tells Dante what he heard about his new job which surprises Olivia. Sonny wants to know if this means Dante will continue to hunt him. Dante, in short: Yep.

-end

February 15 2010

Welcome back. Happy President's Day.

Jax is basically accusing Carly of being a whore and she's not exactly denying it. Sonny seems thrilled.

Mac tries to convince Dante to get Michael's testimony. Dante thinks they have enough evidence. They don't. Dante doesn't want to involve Michael. Thinking as Michael's brother and Sonny's son instead of a cop is exactly what Mac was worried about when he wants to hire Dante.

Lulu doesn't want the condoms Maxie is offering since Dante is recovering from surgery and a bullet wound. Maxie thinks there's more to it than that.

Crazybeth is in the church being revived by a panicked Lucky.

Credits

Lucky is on the phone with 911 telling them Liz's condition. He decides it would be faster to take her to the hospital.

Sam has been called in by Mac - Mac isn't there, but Jason is. A cop calls him out of the room because the interrogation room is not his second home despite popular belief.

Maxie thinks there are too many excuses as to why Lulu and Dante haven't done it. Maxie thinks Lulu has been burned too many times and that Lulu is afraid she'll lose Dante after they have slept together. Lulu turns the conversation over to Maxie and Spinelli saying Maxie is trying too hard. Maxie tricks Lulu into a hug, stuffing the condoms into her bag.

Dante just wants to go by the book to convict Sonny. Mac informs him about Michael's confession. Mac insists there's no personal vendetta. He just wants to to bring Sonny to Justice. But Justice is dead!

Carly: Blah blah blah, you lied. Jax: But Sonny's a bad mobster...blah blah blah. Sonny: I didn't know he was my son...blah blah blah. I hope an earthquake swallows these three up whole.

Sonny and Carly boringness.

Lulu has brought flowers to Dante. She opens her jacket to reveal a very sexy red dress. She instructs Dante to close his eyes so she can set up. She lights candles and it's all sweet. He tells her about still being a cop.

Diane has some poofy fucked up haircut as she enters the police station. She's wearing a long black coat and is pissed because she was pulled away from Max giving her a massage and lingerie which she reveals to Jason. Hee. He promises her triple pay so she walks into the interrogation room where Mac and Sam are. Doesn't Mac have plans with Alexis? I guess that ship has sailed. She lawyers her lawyer jargon and accidently flashes everyone. Awesome.

Dante is proud to reveal that he is now a member of the PCPD. Lulu is happy for him but surprised and a little worried. Dante gets into one of the bags and finds the glow in the dark condoms.

I'd like to just fast forward passed this Carly/Sonny scene but Sonny actually says something that made me spit out my Coke Zero. Sonny: "...If he thinks that you're back with me, then he's gone for good because basically there's no competition." Hee. That line of dialogue epitomizes Sonny completely. Sonny wants her to flatten Jax but thinks in the end, she'll do what she wants to do.

Olivia and Jax are at the metro court. She's telling him about some meaningless problem that the Metro Court is having this week. Just some excuse for them to have a scene together and so that Jax can sulk and Olivia can pry. He tells her everything. Olivia doesn't believe it.

Nikolas sees Matt and Lucky bringing Elizabeth in. Lucky tells Nik that she might have hypothermia and Nikolas turns around and blames Lucky.

Sam is titillated by Diane. She and Jason talk about how they think Diane and Max make a good couple. Outside, Diane thinks Mac is taking it all out on everyone because he doesn't have a valentine. She wants to know if he's tried calling Alexis. I told you: that ship, hopefully, has passed.

Spinelli shows up at chez Maxie with lovely roses. Maxie is dressed in a...I really don't get this...the whole 'alien sex goddess' thing. I don't know if it's the same outfit that Robin wore because I blocked that out of my head. And if it is...eww. You don't share sex outfits. Spinelli is a bit weirded out and I just want to get to the next scene.

Lulu is trying to wrestle the glow-in-the-dark condoms out of Dante's hands. He teases her and it's cute. She explains that Maxie must have put them in the bag. Dante's just horny.

Maxie tries to explain away the Franco stuff again but he's just awed. They make up, move on and make out. Then they shoot each other with ray guns...and....please cut to the next scene.

Jax is on the phone with a lawyer's voicemail about divorce and custody options. Carly comes in pissed that Jax took Josselyn.

Nikolas thinks the way Lucky is treating Elizabeth is cruel. Lucky makes great points about Liz being a liar. Nikolas wants to know where all the compassion went. Dude. That pisses me off. Being a good person and having compassion doesn't mean you have to forgive everyone that betrays you over and over again. Why should Lucky be a doormat that everyone walks all over? It's a shame that Lucky has become so bitter but that's the fault of everyone who made him that way and assumed that he would just shrug it off. Nik assholedly brings up the drinking. He thinks that Lucky is the only one who can help.

He goes to see Liz who is in a hospital room sleeping. Because she's asleep, he gets to do a monologue! He's hurt, betrayed...etc... something inside him is broken. She slowly wakes up.

Sonny is at the hospital asking Olivia about Dante. Olivia tells him the doctors say he's OK. They talk about boring stuff.

Lulu and Dante kiss after she feeds him. Hmmm. He pulls her in closer and she gets on top of him. They both laugh because his heart monitor just got a lot faster.

Carly wants to talk. He again accuses her of sleeping with Sonny and she defends herself that she didn't. He says it doesnt matter and that they should just cut their losses and move on.

Jason and Sam come home to their apartment decorated all valentine's-y. Jason says he gave Kristina and Molly money to decorate. It's very pink.

Elizabeth doesn't know why she's in the hospital. She remembers going to the church. Doctor Lee comes in with Nikolas. Doctor Lee, the baby-doctor. Surprise, surprise: Elizabeth is pregnant.

February 12 2010

This recap is getting a bit of a late start because I came home to find my ceiling collapsed. Yes, that's right. I lost my job, I have no valentine, I cancelled my trip to Australia this morning and there is a giant hole on the top of my hallway closet. My life is like a country song. And yet, I'm still here: recapping General Hospital just for you.

Lucky and Ethan are drinking at Jake's. That sounds like a good idea right now. Ethan is trying to comfort Lucky. Lucky is as bitter as I am.

Crazy Gal goes to the church where she and Lucky were married. I bet there's a flashback. In 5...4..3...2...And there it is! She flashbacks to L&L at the Spencer house where Lucky is being his awesome self.

Jason's pad: Molly and Morgan tell Jason and Sam about what happened between them and Michael at Kelly's. There's a lot of names in that sentence right there.

Michael explains to Mac what happened the night of Claudia's murder. Mac stops him to make sure he knows what he's doing.

Credits

It's snowing outside Dante's hotel room. They flirt and talk about Valentine's and Dante is upset about being fired. Get over it, Dante. They discuss Reyner's douchebaggery. Lulu wants him to fight for his job.

Morgan wants Jason to stop them but he doesn't want to just show up at the PCPD to arouse suspicion. Luckily, Sam has parking tickets just for this occasion. I guess she sold her hooker boots on ebay. She runs off to rescue Michael. Molly wants to know why they didn't just go to the police in the first place. Poor, sweet, naive, annoying Molly.

Sonny's plan is to say he did everything that Michael did. Diane and Carly don't think it's going to work. The arguement gets pretty heated.

Michael continues his story despite Mac's warning. Mac thinks he's faking it.

Lucky wonders if Ethan has ever fallen in love. Ethan says he has but I don't think we're meant to believe him. Lucky gets all philosophical and then tells Ethan about the time he 'died'. They talk about how crazy Helena is but neither of them know she's in town.

Elizabeth talks to God. She flashbacks again to Lucky asking Elizabeth to "be [his] girl". Is this flashback from 1954?

Sam shows up to the PCPD to pay her ticket. She makes an excuse to go to the ladies room so she can see Michael in the interrogation room.

Mac tells Michael that there is evidence that Sonny was in the cabin but Michael insists that he did it. Sam busts in to save the day but it's not needed. Mac kicks both of them out. Sam lies to the cop that she forgot her check book and can't pay the ticket and Mac finds out the fake reason why she was there.

Helena either doesn't get Nik's sarcasm or just ignores it because she has better things to talk about. She wants an heir and Spencer won't do. They talk about Emily, Helena calling her a 'twit' and saying "but she's dead now" in that wonderful deadpan delivery she has. Nikolas doesn't want any more kids. He barely sees the one he has.

Ethan brings up Liz's marriage to Ric Lansing. Lucky lists off all the "dark and deeply troubled" guys that Elizabeth has been with: Ric, Nikolas and Jason. And of course, Zander, who died in a police shoot-out. He's the one who got off lucky.

Crazy girl flashbacks some more about the good times. Gosh, they were so young!

Lulu is reading Smarm magazine. Smarm?? Dante wakes up; he wants to know where Lulu went before. She jokes that maybe she was setting up a hot Valentine's date. Jax stops by because Lulu wants him to help Dante get his job back.

Diane tells Sonny he has until the trial to change his mind and after reprimanding him, leaves. Sonny tells Carly that Diane is just making it seem harder than it really is. Carly isn't buying it.

Jason leaves a message for Diane. Molly and Morgan come in with junk food and Sam comes home with Michael. Jason is frustrated. Michael is frustrated. Everyone is frustrated. Jason just wants Michael and everyone to shut their mouths.

Helena reasons that she doesn't want Spencer to suffer the burden of his heritage. Hee. Nikolas argues that he doesn't want to raise another son just so he can play favorites.

Ethan wants to know why Lucky isn't angrier with Nikolas. They joke about the possibility of a duel. Lucky says Elizabeth keeps finding guys she can't resist sleeping with. Ethan wonders if it's easier to blame Elizabeth but Lucky makes it clear that he hates both of them.

Dante informs Jax that Rayner knows he was lying about his statement. Dante doesn't want Jax's help. I think he does but he's too ashamed to accept it since his statement will make it harder to get Sonny in jail and that, after all, is what Jax wants most. Lulu feels for Jax and doesn't know why Carly keeps defending Sonny. Neither does Jax. Neither does most of the audience.
Jax leaves telling Dante to call him if he changes his mind. Lulu leaves to do something Valentine's related.

Carly and Sonny argue about the trial. She tries to convince him that there's too much evidence against him.

Lucky and Ethan are playing pool. Lucky bitterly watches a kissing couple. Ethan brings up the flyer and his knowledge of Elizabeth's rape. Lucky talks about how he found Elizabeth's that day. Ethan gets all psychologist wondering if Elizabeth has a fear of disappointing Lucky but Lucky says that maybe he loved the memory of Elizabeth more than Elizabeth herself. At least that's what I got out of it.

Mopey Crazy Gal is still at the church.

Lulu comes home to find her apartment decorated with V-day decorations. Maxie almost comes out naked before she realizes it's Lulu. Lulu thinks she may be over-compensating.

Mac comes to visit Dante. He knows about the firing and thinks Sonny will try to get rid of Dante. And then? Mac offers Dante a job. Yeah!

Sam asks Molly to keep Michael's crime a secret. Molly gets it. Jason sounds like a message boarder saying that so many people know that Michael killed Claudia that he wouldn't be surprised if the cops found out too. Hee. It's like he's outside the TV, looking in and realizing how ridiculous it all is! He makes them swear to keep the secret. Molly and Morgan do. Michael? Cut to a new scene.

Carly and Sonny argue some more. It's boring. Nothing new comes out.

Maxie and Lulu plan their respective holiday evenings. Maxie offers her some condoms.

Mac wants Dante's word that he won't compromise his job or himself by protecting Sonny. Dante agrees. Mac has a first assignment for Dante. He wants Dante to get sufficient evidence to subpoena Michael because he thinks Michael was a witness.

Carly wants Sonny to leave the country. She wants him to swear that when she says it's time, he'll go. He finally agrees and hugs her. Jax walks in at that exact moment and is pissed. He thinks she's throwing herself at Sonny to get back at him. Not quite - but close.

Lucky walks in the church (why?) and sees Crazy Elizabeth unconscious on a pew. He tries to wake her up. I hope this doesn't lead to him becoming Mr. Hero man, again..


-end